Alright you mothers out there I need some advice. As the time draws near for Millie to come so many thoughts have been running through my mind. One thing that I am nervous about is our routine. James and I finally agree on bedtime, wake time and nap time. We have an awesome little groove going on. I know Millie will change that, just with the fact that I will no longer be getting a full nights rest.
My question is: Was there something you did to help make the transition with each new kid? Is there some secret to finding a new routine that wont take a year to find? Is there something I can do to make this easy on James and myself??
Please lay it on me, give me all the advice that you can think of!!
11 years ago
4 comments:
A couple of things always help me. First, keep James on his schedule no matter what baby is doing, and try to adapt baby to that as soon as you can. One thing I try to do right away is still put baby down for the night at the same time the other kids go down...it just makes the transition easier and still gives you that little bit of time to yourself. A lot of times, my kids have chosen the time when I have a new baby to try to transition out of napping...don't let that happen! If James starts fighting his nap at all, keep at it. If it becomes apparent that he doesn't need a nap anymore, keep it in the schedule anyway...tell him it is quiet time and he has to stay in his room and read/play quietly until you come and get him. That way, you can eventually transition baby into napping during that same time and you can have a few minutes to yourself! I would also work James into the baby's schedule...like reading to him while you feed the baby, or having a special play time with him after you feed the baby, or during her morning nap or something. If he feels like he is part of her schedule, he will be less interested in making sure he disrupts it! But, I think the biggest thing is...don't worry! I haven't seen you as a mom, but my guess from knowing you in your pre-mom days and reading your blog is that you are a wonderful, patient, loving mom and two will come as naturally to you as one did...I think the transition to two kids is a million times easier than the transition to on kid! You will be just fine, and James will be so excited for his new best friend to arrive!!
I totally agree, the most important thing is to keep older kids on their schedule. It will need to be a bit more flexible than before, but it shouldn't be back to the drawing board or renegotiated. My new babies alway nurse and sleep on demand with no real schedule for the first six months or so. I do put them down for "bedtime" when the older ones go to bed, but usually it's more of an evening nap for them, but it does give me an hour or so with no kids before I go to bed.
Right now we're in the tougher stage where I have two taking one nap a day and one taking two naps a day, but the naps don't overlap at all. I'm working on shifting those a bit, but it's much easier to shift schedules of younger ones.
I agree with "thebillsfamily". She's got lots of great advice. If you are interested, I have a book about baby sleep schedules that I swear by. I've gone back to it with every baby to help me know what's normal for that stage and what is the best way to get there. It's called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". It also applies to James. Maybe that's not the help you were looking for, but it has helped me tons and now I've got great sleepers.
Like what was said before, James has a schedule and Millie won't for the first 2-3 months, so stick to his so he is well rested. You will figure out a rhythm for Millie and by three months, she will be developing a more regular routine that you can plan around. The great thing about newborns is that they need to sleep every 2 hours so odds are, at least one of her naps will overlap with part of James'. :)
The transition to 2 kids wasn't too bad, you've done this before! You will all survive (though you might not think so at the time). Each month will get a little easier, and pretty soon you will manage to get grocery shopping done in between feedings and naps and you will feel like wonder-woman! (Because that is what you are!)
Agreed that you need to keep things as normal for james as possible. It'll just make it harder on everyone if you try to adjust him again. Other than that, I'm no help. Hunter was too young to know any differently. He and Nash were and still are on the same schedule. That's what happens when you have Irish Twins. Good luck Aubs
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